OFF THE CUFF....OFF THE SCALE

20/09/12

 I think its been about 6 weeks ive been writing this blog, couldnt tell you without looking and to look would mean id have to navigate away from this page and start again, so im just guessing. 

 Is it helping? It helps at the time of writing it, but when i write something new and post it, i go back and read the old stuff and im back to where i was, devastated. 

 I think the way ive been stumbling through things is kidding on Budsie is still here, like I just havent spoken to him for a while. 

 Cliche after cliche gets chucked at me when i talk about him, so i dont tend to bring him up as much as i did. 

 1) times a healer

 Actually there could have been a list there but thats the main one that gets brought up all the time. 
Maybe its true, maybe you do learn to deal with it but i cant deal with it, not as long as its a reality. 
My shitty reality. 

 Reisse said to me in March last year, 2 months before scott went, "I really like our life just now, its happy isnt it?" 

 I found that in a diary earlier on, and it breaks my heart at how it ended. NO one saw it coming. 

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