12/12/12
12/12/12
Some say the world was supposed to end today. Some say its the 21st of December.
Some say it was last year, or the year 2000, etc etc etc.
Truth is, does it matter when its' going to end. It ends when it ends. Thats all.
Hope I'm not here to see it, and i hope no one else i love is either.
The world is full of superstition and people worry about things that havent happened and arent going to.
Whatever happens happens.
My life's been on hold for years, and everyone moves on. But i stand still like a static figure in Times Square.
There are things to look forward to but you have to create them first for yourselves.
I wish i could take my own advice.
Coming up the Christmas, another Christmas without Budsie.
Coping is forgetting.
Some times its the only way i can get through a day is to put it out my mind.
I feel i have moved on a lot from when i started this blog though.
This time last year i was still crying myself to sleep every night.
Thats not to say i dont do that now, but only because i try and fill my head with other things to avoid the inevitable.
It was very traumatic that whole time, back then and jealousy still strikes with people who have neices of nephews.
My son has just become a big brother, on his dads side. To say that was hard to take is an understatment but i am happy for him because he has always wanted to be a big brother.
I hope Reisse and little Jacob have a bond unbreakable in the future.
It is weird though because i always thought i would become the one to have another baby, i dont see that ever happening now.
Another reason for his dad to be a hero really but I don't take that away from Reisse.
It is hard being a parent on your own though no matter how much help you get from other people. Emotional support, no back up on your decisions and you never know if youre doing the right thing.
Some say the world was supposed to end today. Some say its the 21st of December.
Some say it was last year, or the year 2000, etc etc etc.
Truth is, does it matter when its' going to end. It ends when it ends. Thats all.
Hope I'm not here to see it, and i hope no one else i love is either.
The world is full of superstition and people worry about things that havent happened and arent going to.
Whatever happens happens.
My life's been on hold for years, and everyone moves on. But i stand still like a static figure in Times Square.
There are things to look forward to but you have to create them first for yourselves.
I wish i could take my own advice.
Coming up the Christmas, another Christmas without Budsie.
Coping is forgetting.
Some times its the only way i can get through a day is to put it out my mind.
I feel i have moved on a lot from when i started this blog though.
This time last year i was still crying myself to sleep every night.
Thats not to say i dont do that now, but only because i try and fill my head with other things to avoid the inevitable.
It was very traumatic that whole time, back then and jealousy still strikes with people who have neices of nephews.
My son has just become a big brother, on his dads side. To say that was hard to take is an understatment but i am happy for him because he has always wanted to be a big brother.
I hope Reisse and little Jacob have a bond unbreakable in the future.
It is weird though because i always thought i would become the one to have another baby, i dont see that ever happening now.
Another reason for his dad to be a hero really but I don't take that away from Reisse.
It is hard being a parent on your own though no matter how much help you get from other people. Emotional support, no back up on your decisions and you never know if youre doing the right thing.
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